…the most wonderful place for a wedding
I say it often, but Scotland is an AMAZING place to get married.
This St Andrew’s Day, a day of saluting of all things Scottish, I’m penning some words of love to my homeland to celebrate just why that is.
Mind you, in these darker days of the year, we Scots are pretty good at celebrating, with Hogmanay (New Year’s Eve) and Burns Night (January 25th) just around the corner. But St Andrew’s Day feels like a grand day to get the party started – and take a look in this blog at locations, traditions, and choosing readings for a Scottish wedding.
The wonderful landscape, majestic cities, history and heritage, culture, food and drink, the people and the passion – all things which make Scotland great.
But it’s also a fantastic place for a wedding, whether that’s a big bash with all your nearest and dearest, a more intimate affair, or an elopement for just the two of you.
You can celebrate your marriage, or civil partnership, or renew your vows just about anywhere – from beautiful venues, to castles, beaches, hillsides, mountains, gardens or even your own living room: it’s all possible. We might need to check out permissions for some spots, but that’s easy to do.
And if you want to have a legal wedding in your chosen place, that’s great. As an Agnostic Scotland (www.agnosticscotland.org) celebrant, I’m authorised to conduct legal marriages through National Records of Scotland, and I’ll guide you with the administration process with the local registrar. Then we just take the paperwork to your desired venue or location on the day and sign it there. I bring the black fountain pen and away we go.
Location, location, location….
There’s nothing quite like arriving at a wedding venue or location as a celebrant and knowing you’re going to be part of a special day in a couple’s lives. It always makes me quite giddy with anticipation.
This lovely work has taken me across my native Dumfries & Galloway and around Scotland over the last couple of years, and I love the country more and more with each place I visit.
Along the Solway coast and to the edge of the Southern Uplands; the turret room in a castle; family gardens; secluded beaches and hillsides in the Hebrides; the splendour of a botanic garden, and a beautiful Victorian glasshouse elopement; fabulous venues with welcoming teams – Scotland really is your oyster when it comes to wedding locations.
For more unusual spots, we can just do a bit of research into any permissions needed, and can give a grid reference for the legal papers if we’re off the beaten track.
One of my favourite memories of doing this was for a marriage at a couple’s treasured wild camping spot beside a river near Glencoe in the Highlands. The sun shone over the hills, and a small group of family and friends, along with a host of lovely dogs, gathered beside a stony beach for a wonderful ceremony – followed by a dip for some of the more hardy revellers.
The access road was the one made famous by Daniel Craig and Dame Judi Dench in the Bond film Skyfall, and of course I had to channel my inner M on the way home and stop for a photo at ‘Skyfall corner’. With my middle initial being M, and a driver called James (my husband), it would have been rude not to….
Rituals and traditions….
For a country so rich in history and tradition, we have plenty of ritual elements which can be blended into marriage ceremonies.
A few of my favourites are handfasting, quaich toasts and holding oathing stones, but we can also create something completely personal to you if you fancy.
Handfasting is a very traditional ritual, and it’s thought to be where the phrase ‘tying the knot’ comes from. Believed to be Celtic in origin, it is used around the world in many different cultures.
A couple face each other, and fabric, ribbons or cords are placed over their joined hands. The choice for what to use for your handfasting ties is endless – from tartans to bespoke artisan cords, to anything that’s personal to you. I have done a handfasting with a pink feather boa and a football scarf; such fun.
This is a ritual which some couples choose for after their vows and exchanging rings, to seal in their commitments to each other, or choose to do when sharing personal or legal vows. Or hands could be tied for the whole ceremony.
When couples release their hands, the knot remains, and it’s a lovely wedding keepsake.
Toasting the marriage with a drink from a quaich, or two-handled loving cup, is another ancient Scottish tradition. Warring clans would make peace with a drink from a shared cup, and newlywed couples would celebrate the union of their two families.
Today, it can be a brilliant way to seal in a couple’s promises and commitments to one another, and you could invite your witnesses or guests to join in too.
Traditionally a dram of whisky would be used to fill the quaich, but it can be anything – your favourite alcoholic or non-alcoholic tipple. Irn Bru anyone?
Another lovely little ritual is holding an oathing stone while saying vows, based on the tradition that holding the stone will ‘set the words in stone’.
Stones can be ones found in a setting special to you – your favourite beach, or a treasured part of the country perhaps; or you can buy them and get them specially engraved. Ever since I found a heart-shaped stone on the shore in Plockton on the way to Skye, I have been obsessed with looking for more…..
This ritual can also be combined with handfasting, or can be used standalone near the start of the ceremony to set up the commitments you’ll be making.
Another tradition we love at Agnostic Scotland is planting a tree for every couple and family we work with. We support the rewilding charity, Trees for Life, in the Highlands and I so look forward to donating a native sapling to our grove in the Caledonian Forest, close to Loch Ness, after every wedding. Roots forever in Scotland.
Words of love….
One of the things I also love to do is encourage couples to think about adding a poem, reading, song or performance to their wedding ceremony if they wish. It adds something so special.
An Agnostic Scotland ceremony is completely personalised to the couple – there is no template, and no two ceremonies are the same. I create and write the ceremony with you – it’s your ceremony and you can choose exactly how you want it to be.
We have such a wealth of poets, writers, songwriters and films set in or about Scotland: there’s so much choice to ponder if you want to add a Scottish touch in this way. And I’m always more than happy to help couples find a reading which suits them.
I grew up and live in Dumfries & Galloway, in the south west of the country, so our national bard – our global superstar poet, Robert Burns – is always close to my heart.
Rabbie lived, worked, loved, and spent his last days in and around Dumfries, and many of his great works, including Auld Lang Syne, were written there.
Some of my favourite lines of his on love come from A Red, Red Rose:
Till a’ the seas gang dry, my dear,
And the rocks melt wi’ the sun:
I will luve thee still, my dear,
While the sands o’ life shall run.
Pretty much sums up how I feel about Scotland too,
With love,
Anne x